My Last Post of the Year

It's less than a week until Christmas. We weren't able to get presents like we usually do but we have the kids' Christmas covered at least and they are looking forward to it. We are also having Christmas dinner which will include all the step kids, their mother, my mother-in-law, my aunt, cousins, a couple of my sisters, and a niece. There may be more. Who knows?

Since it's so close to Christmas and because my Yahoo! beats won't be available until after the 1st, I'm going to take the time "off" to really dig into finishing the final draft of Future Past. This means I also won't post here either. I'm only going to update my client blogs which shouldn't take up much time at all.

I'm not as bah humbug as I was last year about this time but I still harbor an amount of sadness as I realize just how much has changed in my life this year. Never would I have ever imagined that my family would be as fractured as it is. I've found out things about several people I love that have really diminished my faith in humanity in general. I've learned that the ones you look up to most will hurt you the worst. I've learned that standing up for yourself and trying to do what's right will inevitably make people tell you that you're a self important and self righteous person who cares about no one but herself. So as you can see, not a lot of what I've learned this year has been good.

At a time when I was shy, weak, was afraid to put my writing out there, and never voiced my thoughts, I seemed to have more people that cared about me. I learned to start standing up for what I believed in and going after what I wanted in life when I started having kids. Now that I've been doing that, the real in people started coming out and it isn't always pretty.

But I'm realizing that I have more friends than I thought I had, people who do accept me and care about me for who I am and I'd rather appreciate them then I would dwell on those who want to blame me for their own actions.

So for all of you out there who have read what I've written and enjoyed it to the point you looked me up online, thank you from the bottom of my heart. To the woman who lives near my hometown and made me feel really special this week by emailing me and asking me to meet her to sign my haiku calendar, thank you. To the people who support me in my endeavors, thank you. To my online friends who I enjoy bantering with, thank you for just being there and making me smile throughout my day. To my real life friends and family members who are also my friends, I truly appreciate each one of you. I hope your holidays are filled with warmth, love, and smiles.

For whatever you celebrate this time of year, I wish you the best. Merry Christmas from my family to yours.

See ya next year!

Pamela