Hello, from the losing side. :)

Elections were early last week. I meant to update soon after, but lost myself in a sea of playing "catch-up." (Don't we all?)

So... I lost the election. It was no surprise really. When I qualified, I'd been told by a number of reliable people that the incumbent was not going to run again. Then, the next thing I knew, he did decide to run. As soon as I found out, I knew I would be hard-pressed to get my name out there enough to run a successful campaign, especially when I had many on the council against me, the reason being that many of them didn't agree with a stance I'd taken some years ago concerning a micro-managing of the police department. And that's okay. To each their own. I suspect that they also knew that I would fight what's been going on with town employee raises versus personal property sales. But, as things often go, life goes on, and I find myself trying not to care because there really isn't anything I can do now. I put myself out there, and that's all one can possibly do.

In any case, I've resumed regular programming. I often feel like I have about a thousand tabs open in my brain on any given day, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't know how often I will be able to update this blog, but I will try to pop in with tidbits of stuff now and then. In the meantime, I hope your Intro to Fall 2016 is off to a great start!

Peace, love, and moving on,

Pamela

Next summer will be better.

Back Stuff

An update on my back pain saga: I realize that I haven't updated since January. I left off waiting on new MRI results. I have another rupture at L5/S1. The SAME disc I'd had surgery on in 2011. The rupture isn't as pronounced as it was then, so at least I don't have the disc pressing on the root nerve and shooting pain down my leg. After the round of steroids which helped dramatically with the pain, I've taken to making sure I don't miss a single day of physical therapy. In fact, my hubs and I got rid of our *Dish Network so we could spend that money on a Body Vision membership instead; now, I can continue aquatic therapy. Swimming and aquatic therapy are the best strengthening (and thus pain relieving) options for back issues.

*Note: We rid ourselves of Dish Network partly because of their continued refusal to carry WHNT. Really, Dish Network? And now I've heard the problem has extended to WAFF. We also took that plunge because it's just an outrageous amount of money. We don't watch but maybe 5% of the channels, if that.

In any case, my doc said another surgery would be in order should the pain become too much. I told him I'd rather not. As long as I'm not in constant pain so much that I can't sleep, I don't see the point. I'll be in pain, surgery or not, so I might as well deal with it in other ways first. So far, it has been manageable. Like I said in one of my previous posts, I had to find a new normal. I had to stop focusing on what other people's "normals" are, and create my own.

The Summer from...

I'm not just talking about the heat.

In more than one way, this summer has been one of the more difficult summers I've had in a long time. I've been dealing with an allergy issue that pretty much tore me apart emotionally and physically. I'd walked out and about looking like I was Patient Zero for the next apocalyptic plague. Yes, perhaps I'm being a bit dramatic, but the roller coaster I was on leaves no room for anything but. Thankfully, this issue is being resolved, and the roller coaster has departed. But that leads me to the next issue...

Back in May when I walked to get my diploma, I was on top of the world. I'd gotten my degree. I could accomplish anything. I admit that my expectations were probably just a tad too high. I'd allowed others' praises to boost those expectations. After all, my grades were fantastic, and I'd been graced with memberships into even the most prestigious honor societies. I'd been invited to present papers at conferences, and came highly recommended by many strong professors, supervisors, and colleagues. I pride myself in being able to take a struggling student at the beginning of a semester, and assist their learning of material and concepts, so that by the end of the semester, they reach their goals. My heart swells with so much happiness every time a student thanks me for helping them.

None of this has mattered, though.

I don't say this for pity, and while I admit that I have pitied myself here and there over the summer, overall, I'm sharing this because I know others go through this, too. I thought my honors and grades and recommendations would easily land me a job, but right now, I can't honestly say that any of it matters. I've been on a number of interviews, but have been passed up each time. A couple of those jobs have simply been because others with more experience applied. One was because I didn't have the exact qualifications the principal was looking for. Others, I'm not quite sure why I was passed up. I requested feedback from some of those principals, but have yet to receive any replies.

The space under my dining table has become my supply stash; I've been hoarding things for a few years now, and I still need to buy more totes! I'm just waiting for a classroom to put it all to use.

So right now, as the school year gets back to business, I'm finding myself leaving the only job where
I've ever felt like I'm making a difference, and the only job where I've felt that my talents and skill-sets are being fully utilized. I'm highly disappointed that I'm in the same rut I was in before I started college. It's rather dejecting, to say the least. I know I'm a good teacher, and I have the background and recommendations to prove it. But I'm heading into a job that doesn't require any degree, and where I can't implement the lesson plans that spontaneously pop into my head at random hours of the day. Don't get me wrong; subbing has it's perks. I still get to be in the classroom, and each day brings along something new. In some ways subbing is like being a grandparent; I get to spend time with the kids, I get to lavish them with attention, and then I get to give them back to their regular teacher. It is a blessing, but it's not where I'd like to be.

As a result, I'm working on ways to improve. I first need to get past my initial social awkwardness, because I think this is one thing that is holding me back in interviews. I'm also looking into other ways to better utilize that time with the principal. There has got to be more effective ways of proving that I'm good at what I do, while also conveying that I'm eager to continue learning and growing.

Sooooo, on that note, I'm going to dive right into it.

Peace, love, and job searching,

Pamela

Running for Fyffe City Council

Hi everyone! I'm announcing my candidacy for Fyffe city council. I'm running because I have a desire to serve, and to show my children and students that community involvement does not have to seem like such a foreign concept.

I have two primary goals in mind as I begin my campaign:

First, I feel like UFO Days needs a facelift. A few years ago, I served on the committee for UFO Days, and while the event is handled well, and is generally just fine otherwise, I feel like it could use an overhaul. For example, it shouldn't have to cost a small fortune for a family of four to come out and have fun. Yes, while some inflatables are free and the music is free, I think that we should really look into adding more free activities, games, and events. When I take my kids out, I am "dollared" to death at these festivals; I can't imagine what it costs those with more than two children! Another example is the lack of music targeting Fyffe's youth. I think we can do a better job at showing the teenagers of Fyffe that we value their participation in the community.

Second, I'd like to explore the possibility of putting together a technology center. Fyffe needs a Wi-Fi hotspot without having to buy drinks and food, and we need a place with multiple computers for the community to use. I can envision tutors teaching Joe Fyffe how to work his email and Jane Fyffe how to create files and folders for the recipes she wants to digitally store. I can envision classes on the basics of computer use, or classes on how to work specific programs or websites. A community technology center would only benefit Fyffe.

A little about me: I have lived in Fyffe most of my life. I'm a graduate of Fyffe High School, Northeast Alabama Community College, and Athens State University. I'm currently an adjunct English instructor at NACC. I've been married to my fantastic husband for eleven years, and am also a mom, stepmom, and Nana. In addition to being a teacher, I am also a writer, editor, and designer. I am capable and ready to serve my community. I hope you vote for me and allow me that chance.

I've been answering questions and sharing thoughts on my Facebook group, Pamela Gifford for Fyffe Council. Feel free to read and/or join!

ETA: Please mark AUGUST 23 on your calendars, and go vote! :)

Thanks y'all!

Peace, love, and voting,

Pamela

A look at the new Mathemathics, Science, and Engineering Technology Center at Northeast Alabama Community College

The new building on the Northeast Alabama Community College campus has been under construction for quite some time. I am pleased to have gotten permission from Dr. David Campbell, the college's president, to take some photos for this post.

The Alpha and Beta math labs that were once in the upper level of the gym will now be housed in the in the new Mathematics, Science, and Engineering Technology Center close to the lyceum. In addition, many of the relevant faculty, whose offices were either in the gym or the old math building, have moved into new offices on the second floor of this spacious, beautiful structure. I'm sure they are super-excited. As an added bonus, a tornado shelter is located in the basement.

The dedication for this new addition to NACC will be next month. In the meantime, classes will commence in the new Center this summer. Thanks to Dr. Campbell for allowing me to tour and take photos. It was a joy to see the new addition. Almost makes me wish I was taking classes again!

I am proud to be a former Mustang student and even prouder to be an employee of this wonderful college!

Your child and internet pictures.

Yesterday was a fun day! Despite the threat of impending storms, we geared up and set off on our
trick-or-treat run. The kids got to meet Iron Man at the Fort Payne Police Department (above - which was the highlight of their trip) and Fyffe once again put on a good event at the park. Though some people didn't make the connection between my costume and my little Batman and Robin, I was still pretty happy with it.


Why so serious?

The evening led to an interesting discussion on my Facebook page about letting strangers take pictures of kids to post on social media. There was a lady where we were dining asking to take a pic of my kids to post on Facebook. I refused and though I could be wrong, she seemed a little offended about it.

Now, I might consider allowing this if it is for a business or organization and I knew exactly what they would do with the picture but it isn't my policy to just allow anyone, even family, to take pics of my children to post online. I can never be certain who really understands and utilizes privacy settings in the right way. Occasionally, I will post publicly set pictures of my children but that practice for me is limited. I decide who, when, where, and how my kids are portrayed. I chose to include the picture above because it illustrates our fun night. The internet, just like the real world, can be dangerous. There is another reason, too. When my kids are grown, what effect will ceaselessly posting public pictures of them do? I can't answer that and neither can any parent given that we don't have insight into their future lives and careers. I admit I cringe a bit when I see my friends post public pictures of babies and children over and over. I'm not judging; do what you feel is okay, but I always wonder if the user behind the posting understands privacy settings; if they really mean to post so many pictures for the entire world.

Back to the lady in the restaurant: I suspect she was an employee but she didn't identify herself, and given the circumstances, it was doubtful that she managed the restaurant's Facebook page. That is the first rule of social media management, which I have experience in. You don't take and post pictures without stating who you are, who you represent, and what you plan on doing with the picture. It's okay to ask, and encouraged. It would be rude to just starting snapping pics. And a little weird.

And if you're just a person asking to take pics of random children, that comes off creepy.

It is our job to ensure that our actions don't place our children in danger. So here's a screenshot to illustrate how to change those settings on your photos.

You can enlarge the photo by clicking on it. Notice in the top right there is a little world icon next to my name. Click the one on your photo and you can change that from public to friends only, or whatever you want.

Note: I didn't blur names or anything from the screenshot because this post on my Facebook is public which also means that anyone who comments on it also shares that comment publicly. Anytime you comment on a public post, ANY public post, personal wall, fan page, whatever it is (settings for that post will be denoted by the icon that displays next to the user's name), you are commenting for the whole world to see.

I hope I've been of some assistance. Let me know what you think in the comments.

Peace, love, and parenting,

Pamela

Sad over the loss of Jr Garmany

Today my heart is heavy. I learned yesterday that my boss and friend, Jr Garmany passed away. He'd had some health problems but this was a shock to us all. Let me tell you a little about this man, who was a prominent figure in Fyffe and DeKalb.

Update: Visitation for Junior Garmany will be at the WT Wilson Funeral Home in Shiloh (between Rainsville and Fyffe on Hwy 75) on Saturday 3 - 8pm and funeral will be Sunday at 2pm.

Jr Garmany was a name I grew up knowing. He was a friend of my grandfather and the former police chief of Fyffe. I actually first met him last year when we both ran for Fyffe council. He, like me, saw a need for Fyffe and stepped up to try to do something about it. Though we both lost the election (him by a very narrow margin), it is commendable to have the courage to stand up and try to do what one thinks is right, which is just the kind of person he was.

After, I saw the need for a steady job. As any writer knows, writing doesn't always equal a steady paycheck. The many things I do is always scattered when it comes to pay so when I found out that the Shop and Go was hiring, I put in for the job, having had extensive c-store experience. I was hired and as the store owner, Jr became my boss.

Over the last year, my schedule hasn't always been the easiest to work around. Robbie, our store manager, has been such a wonderful blessing in that she understands that I need time for school, my family, and my writing. When I found myself in a bind several months ago, I approached Jr about bringing my boys with me to work to cover the gap between when I went in and my husband got off to come get them. He gave the go ahead to see if it would work out and has since spent a lot of time sitting at one of the dining booths with my boys listening to their chatter about anything from Momma's personal fears to Ninja Turtles. "I'm learning more than I want to know about you, Pam," he said to me laughing after my boys spilled our family details one afternoon. There are very few bosses that would allow a struggling mother to bring her children to work.

There was a time when I was first hired that Jr would come in the store and call me "Pat". I wasn't going to correct him. I thought it was humorous. It was only after another friend, Wade Murdock, yelled at him about getting my name right did he start calling me by my real name. And that's something else I can't help but smile about; the way Wade and Jr talked to each other was the way competitive but loving brothers talked to one another. Wade isn't one to mince words. "Get your ass up outta that chair and get up here!" Wade would holler at him over the phone. Anytime Jr needed something, though, Wade was there.  And the little things I'll miss; Jr would call me every Friday night to get the local football scores and chide me almost every day I worked to turn off the middle row of lights in the store to save on the electric bill.

We were talking one day about running for council again. He asked me if I'd run and I told him I didn't know. I told him I might have to get a teaching job out of state because I wasn't sure about the availability of jobs in the area. "Naw," he said with a dismissing wave of his hand. "You can work here."

"Why, sure," I said sarcastically. "Go to school for four years and still work at the Shop and Go."

"We'll hang your diploma up there in the window. I'll even put a little light on it," he said. It was nice to know that if I couldn't get a teaching job right away, I still had the store, even though I knew he was teasing me.

But what sticks out the most is the way he understood people. "People make mistakes," he once told me. "It doesn't mean they are bad people." He showed compassion where others might dismiss and that is the type of legacy that I can only hope to leave behind.

Everyone has their own way of grieving. Writing this out, letting those who might not have known him know what kind of person he was, is the only way I can deal with this grief right now. My prayers are with his family and other friends. He had many. He touched many lives. And I'm proud to say that he touched mine.

Peace, love, and we'll miss you, Jr,

Pamela

P.S. If you have a story about Jr, could you leave it in the comments below? I would love to read more about him.

The Meth War in DeKalb - When are regulations too much?

Anyone who has been around me this winter knows that I've struggled from one cold/sinus episode to another. I was even knocked out with the flu a couple of weeks ago. Normally I would just go to my doc and get a shot in the hip but it doesn't really work and it still takes me forever to get over... only to have a couple of days of peace before the stuffiness starts again.

So I decided to try something different this time. While searching the Walmart cold relief shelf, I saw the cardboard display for the regulated cold medicines that I could purchase at the pharmacy counter. Having never done that before, I wasn't sure what to expect. I thought I would have to show my license, maybe sign something, but it wasn't that simple. The clerk got my license and took a good five full minutes inputting ALL my information in her computer. Never once did she crack a smile and even regarded me with disdain. By the time I paid her for my perfectly legal purchase, I felt like I'd done something wrong.

It's kind of like trying on clothes at most stores. First you have to check in with an employee who will physically count the number of items you have, then they have to lead you back and unlock the door to the fitting room, and then you see all these large-lettered signs proclaiming, "SHOPLIFTERS WILL BE PROSECUTED!" as if you had no clue that stealing was illegal. And the friskiness of airport security can be attributed to the stupidity of those who have no regard for others.

Don't get me wrong. I get it. I've been in retail. I get that there are people who will not bat an eye at stealing. I even had a cousin one time try to distract me while his friend lifted a carton of cigarettes. There are people out there who have no regard for others. They want what they want when they want it and they don't care who they rip off to get it. Drugs are an even bigger evil. There have been so many people who have had their lives affected or ruined by meth. I read an account from another local blogger last week about how her family had been terrorized because of her father-in-law's meth addiction. I've had police officers tell me how meth is "the devil" and how a large percentage of the calls they deal with are directly and indirectly related to meth.

But at what point do we, as a society, continue to tolerate being treated like criminals? I understand there are no easy answers. Anyone who has been affected by meth (like anyone affected by terrorism, I imagine) would likely not have any qualms about promoting the inconvenience of a few if it meant saving lives. While I can understand that mind-set, something about it still bothers me. Why do I have to be treated like a criminal because others want to be stupid? Why should I have to feel like I'm doing something wrong when I buy a legal substance? It's confusing. On one hand, you want to promote safety and you want these meth makers and dealers ousted, but what price do we have to pay otherwise?  I wish I had the answers. I'm terribly sorry for those who have had to deal with this horrible drug.

Perhaps the first step would be that Walmart inform their employees not to assume that when someone buys a pseudoephedrine product, they are going to use it for nefarious purposes. I understand they have to get that information but they can at least be a little kinder about it.

And as an aside, and I'm not getting paid to say this, Mucinex Max D, while expensive, has made me feel so much better than anything the doctor has prescribed the last few months. It started wearing off about hour 9-10 (it's supposed to last 12 hours) but while it was working, I could actually breathe and my head didn't feel like it was going to explode. I'll definitely be getting Mucinex again once my supply has exhausted.  By then, I may be patted down or followed to my car to be searched.

Peace, love, and relief,

Pamela

I'm late for New Year.

With the end of the year, come the inevitable end-of-year blog posts. Yes, I'm a little behind but as long as it's done, right? As if my readers were anxiously waiting on this one blog post to get them through the rest of their first week of the year, right? Haha. :) The second Barrier was supposed to be out by now, too. Maybe the rest of the year won't find me struggling two steps behind.

This year, like the last few years, hasn't been bad but it hasn't been good either. I've been searching for a happiness that I've been unable to acquire and while I feel I'm closer now than I've ever been, I still have some inner searching left to do before I get there. For the purpose of the moment, I am happy. Cryptic? Perhaps.  Like any other normal person, I haven't gotten it all figured out yet and probably never will.

Over the last year, I've grown.  Last year, I thought nothing of airing frustrations and intimate details of my life on the internet. I also thought nothing of writing whatever crossed my fancy. I cared more about making what money I could without regard to who it might hurt along the way. Over the last several months, I'm a little more subdued in my writing. It's not because I'm censoring myself, I'm just trying to have a little more consideration.

My time is also very limited these days and I can't stop and dive into the businesses of those around me, no matter how much I think the public should know. The voters of Fyffe made it clear they didn't care what I thought and as a result, a good man lost his job and lively-hood. But I digress. I'm no longer living in Fyffe so I've been working to shift my focus from Fyffe. I still care, but I can't allow myself to become any further emotionally invested in the inner workings of the town, not when so much is going on with my personal life.

And that's what brings me to this reflection. I can't dive into the inner workings of what's going on in my life right now. I'm going through one of the hardest things I've ever been through but for the sake of friends and family, I will not write about it for the public to gape at. A year ago, I would have blogged about it and let my fingers run amok across the keyboard. Not any longer. And that's a good thing, I think.

In any case, I'm not sad, I'm not depressed, I'm not so busy that I don't stop and enjoy what I have every so often. I have my kids and my writing and that is happiness in its own way. I will not make resolutions. I think if you have to wait until the new year to make and follow through with resolutions, it is bound for failure. Instead, make resolutions year round. If you want something, strive for it no matter what time of year it is.  And as a personal message to a certain someone should they choose to read this, don't rely on others to define your happiness, go for it on your own. That is an awfully heavy burden for other people, big or small, to have.

My goal for the upcoming year is to simply push forward. I'll be starting another school next fall. I'll be releasing another novel this year. I'll be celebrating the arrival of new family members, namely my first great-nephew that I'm looking very forward to meeting! I'll rejoice that I've made it to 35 without any major catastrophes. The only thing I'll actually hope for (as opposed to "making it so") is to be in less pain in 2013.

In any case, I'll leave you with a poem I wrote for NewYear's last year; it remains one of my favorites. To each of you, Happy New Year. Be blessed, be kind, and be happy.

Peace, love, and pushing forward,

Pamela

More Back Issues and a Hospital FAIL

The last several weeks have been some of the most stressful and busiest that I remember having in a long time. Aside from my writing and editing, I had to take a local part time job. I enjoy the job and it is a steady paycheck. In addition, I've just finished with finals and managed to squeak onto the Dean's List. It's not the President's List like my last semester but I'll take it, be happy with it, and vow to do better next semester. I'm also in the middle of moving, right here at Christmas. So yeah, my brain and time has been scattered.

As if that wasn't enough, my back seems to be getting worse. I went for another MRI last week to see what's going on. Which leads me into the main topic of this post:

A dear friend of mine who has had similar problems with her back, recently suffered from spinal compression. It was a horrible thing for her to go through and she still has a long road ahead. Such a thing happening to me has been a fear in the back of my mind since I began having these back troubles. The fact that my friend is going through this makes my heart hurt. But I'm also pissed. She, like me, had been telling her doctors for years that something more was going on with her back than simple strain. Only recently had they been taking her claims a little more seriously. Who knows if this could have been prevented.

But the kicker came when the local hospital sent her home with nothing more than pain meds and said she needed to rest. Are you freaking kidding me?  It is not my goal to demonize the entire hospital staff or even the entire ER staff; every time I have personally had a problem with myself or my children, we may have had to wait a very long time but we were taken care of (though I will mention one ER doc that stood at the door to my son's room, talked to me for five minutes only because I had him stand there and answer my questions, then charged me a couple of thousand for that). And I realize there is only so much nurses can do. However, even I know that when someone comes in to the ER with severe back pain, incontinence, and partial paralysis, you don't send them home with an order to rest, you send them for a MRI. That is a failure on so many levels... I just can't comprehend how someone with a medical degree can make a call like that. I could really go on about what I've witnessed at this hospital but I'll leave it at that for now.

Another hospital is taking care of her now.  I suppose I can be pissed all I want but anger won't help anyone.

In any case, I'll update when I get additional results in. I've given up on any normalcy that might have been. I figure this is what my life will consist of; struggling to move and pain.

On a happy note, though, the second Barrier story is close to its release date! Keep an eye out.

Until next time...

Peace, love, and common sense,

Pamela

Voting reflections and... wait, where have I been?

Coffee Time - (n.) That short stretch of time in the morning where you know you should be starting work but you can't until you've consumed at least half a cup of coffee.

As an aside, I enjoy the simpleness of the picture to the right, though I should note that my regular coffee cup is three times larger than that one.

I just spent my coffee time sifting through additional candidate and amendment chatter to make my final decisions this election day. To say I'm disenchanted with politics in general is an understatement. I think that our money-hungry government rather prefers to bog the people down in paperwork and extraneous language rather than DO something that makes a difference.

Nevertheless, I'm doing my part. I do think we're lucky to live in a nation that allows us to vote, no matter how corrupt the system has become. While I don't believe my national vote means much because of the nonsensical way they count votes, local elections deserve attention, too. Though I feel strongly about some of the candidates, having run for a local office, I have a little more tact than I used to because I've gotten a taste of what people expect of you and how people react to you when you run for public office. It's more challenging than any average person might expect. Heck, it's more challenging than I even expected. But I'm glad for the experience and the insight it provided. One might even say that it's had a positive effect on me; I no longer jump to criticize and I take more time looking at the overall picture than I once did.

In any case, I hope you go out and vote today, just because you can.

In the meantime, I realize that I'm not posting like I usually do and there are two reasons for that.  First, I'm going through a rough patch personally.  While it hasn't affected my desire to write, it has diminished my want to share.  Second, this semester of school has been especially difficult and time consuming. I'm coming up on finals in a month and this blog is a little low on the priority list so there hasn't been, and likely won't be, much of me to go around for a while.

But I'm still here and I'm still kicking. Writing-wise, I have the second Barrier story coming out very soon. No word on how my latest novel is faring just yet so we'll see.

Have a good week!

Peace, love, and breathe,

Pamela

Don't forget the blood drive...

For local peeps, tomorrow will be a blood drive at the Senior Center in Fyffe on Graves Street honoring Kolby Clayton, the 16 year-old Crossville boy who died from injuries sustains in a car crash on April 12, 2012.

While I didn't personally know Kolby, only saw him in passing, I'm lucky to be able to call his mom, Brandi Clayton, a friend.  She is the sweetest person you could ever know and has a God-given talent for being even-tempered in times where I don't know I could've kept from turning red.  She is hosting this event to both honor Kolby and thank the Red Cross for the 39 units of blood they used to try to save Kolby's life.

The drive is from 10am - 3pm. Pending they don't reject me (I currently have the crud), I'll be rolling up my sleeve.

Here's a poem I wrote. I dedicate it to Brandi and her family in honor of Kolby:

Storm and Calm

There's something magical about the sky

How it's never-ending blue

How it holds the world together

How it hides behind ominous clouds

Only to reveal its beauty

Arms open

After the hardest of times

There's something enchanting about a rainbow

How it bends so easily

How the colors blend but stay separate

How it is God's promise

Of a world safe from flood

Solid

Yet unable to grasp

And there's something about a passed loved one

How they are so close

How they are so far

How the heart aches in shreds

But knowing they are happy

And exploring

Brings a sad peace

There's something beautiful about heaven

How we pray

How we wave

How we look forward to the day

We, too, take that step

Into the blue

To hold them again

Kindergarten conquered! Reality of 1st Grade hasn't quite hit me yet.

My son graduated from kindergarten yesterday. At the risk of sounding horribly cliche, it seems like just yesterday I was dropping him off for his very first day.

Simply from a work-at-home mom perspective, it's amazing how much your child going to school opens up the world around you. I have a new appreciation for the job teachers do. I've also become more community-aware. It's hard to explain but, indeed, as much as his world changed, the world changed a little for me, too.

When the year first started, we had some problems adjusting. It took several weeks before the crying stopped. The first several days were fine, but then the reality that he had to get up early and go to school every day set in. I can't say that we didn't have a few unpleasant mornings in there as is true with any parent, I suppose.

Get ready for long, hot summer days!

Then came the behavior tickets. He pulled quite a few those the first couple of weeks as he tested the boundaries of the rules his teacher had set. And even then, his behavior wasn't optimal. Then came his horrible handwriting. I couldn't understand why he wasn't thriving and was already considering how we might approach holding him back a year. But then we took him for an eye exam (shout out to the fine folks at Dr. Habel's office in Rainsville!) and found out he was severely far-sighted and let me tell you, after he got his glasses, he was like a brand new kid. He walked around saying, "Wow, I can see up close now," not realizing before that moment that he'd had any problem seeing at all. His behavior improved and his grades improved. And the proudest moment of any writer mommy? He discovered his love for books. We now make regular trips to the Rainsville Library and he's signing up for their Summer Reading Program.

But as much as I enjoyed watching him thrive in school this year, I'm doubly looking forward to enjoying the summer. I've taken off school, too, in order to take advantage of the first summer I've been able to breathe in six years. I might post some of the adventures we have planned here on my blog.

In the meantime, congratulations to all the graduates out there from kindergarten on up! 

First grade? Naw, don't really want to even think about that just yet.

Peace, love, pomp and circumstance,

Pamela

Dear Sylvania, Christianity isn't reflected by what's written on a sign.

I rarely write about religion because when I do, it tends to:

(A) Bring the ugliest of ugly out in people.

and/or

(B) Sets me up as a verbal punching bag for those who don't respect others' opinion and/or are angry about anything and everything and yet about nothing in particular.

But I'm putting it out there anyway. Like it or don't; this is how I feel about this Sylvania mess.

Mild(?)-Mannered Politicians By Day, God's Warriors By Night

This whole Sylvania town sign fiasco has gotten people in a tizzy. Who will be the hero? It appears Councilman Tony Goolesby has stepped up to the plate. "I'm ready to stand-up for God!" he proclaims and a cheer erupts from the cyber-sphere. And just in time for elections, too. Oh, how easy it is for the masses to forget that just a few short years ago, this very man who is standing up for God lost his temper over a simple political matter at Ider Mule Days and ended up getting himself arrested.

On a side note, for those who would say it is a fluke, it's not that hard not to get arrested. I'm not saying I'm infallible, just that I've been on this Earth for 34 years and have yet to have a "run-in" with the law. Okay, so once about a decade and a half ago, I got a ticket for coming to a "rolling stop" at a stop sign, courtesy of the Fort Payne PD . Other than that, I haven't found it that difficult to behave in public.

Now, I don't know Councilman Goolesby personally (probably just as well) and I don't know if he's running for reelection (Update: I actually found out today - 5/15/12 - that he is running for mayor, so there you go), but I do want to put out a word of caution to voters who seem all too eager to jump on the religious bandwagon. I will say (DISCLAIMER: in no direct relation to Goolesby!), that when it comes to campaigns and elections and so forth, it's easy for any politician to proclaim they are Christian but it doesn't always mean the same thing to them that it may mean to you. When there is money or power involved, people will say or do almost anything to get their way, even if it means using their faith as a catalyst for support. I've always based my voting decisions with an amount of skepticism in cases of religion, as should everyone.

Signs with Scripture = Heaven?

As for the signs, I can see both sides of the fight. I think it's incredibly sad that there are people out there with nothing better to do than go poking around for the slightest little thing to gripe about. 

But, it is the law and aren't Christians supposed to obey the law of the land? No government should give the perception that it endorses, backs, or mandates any religion. I'm a Christian and even I agree with that.

I once had a preacher man tell me how baffled he was about how anyone could claim themselves a Christian but be okay with the above sentiment. Because I'm aware of our history, I say. I'm aware how many of our ancestors fled their home countries because of government mandated religion. Do we really want to give our government the power to tell us who, what, when, where, and why we can worship? Because that's how it starts. Keep reading.

But what ticks me off the most are the comments referring to "Christian rights" and how our rights are being stripped away.

Humor me, por favor, and answer the below questions for me:

1. Will anyone arrest you or cut off your head if you walk into a park, a store, or other public venue, bow your head, and pray?

2. Are you forced to attend a church not of your choosing?

3. Are you worried about your life and the lives of your family because you believe in God?

No? Great. Then riddle me this:

What rights exactly are being stripped away that prohibits you from praying, attending church, and worshipping God as you see fit?

Because, see, our ancestors didn't have that luxury. They were told by their governments when, where, and how to pray. But that's okay; as long as that government's beliefs lined up with your own, then there wasn't a problem, right? Wrong, because with any change in government leadership came a change in beliefs. And if you didn't conform, you were killed. Read up on your history, especially in the Middle Ages in Europe. Heck, take a look at what happened to Jews less than a century ago.

“Oh, but Pamela, you're being silly. We would never resort to those barbaric measures.”

You may not, but how can you be so certain of everyone in the Christian faith? Take the Westboro Baptists, for instance, who think its okay to protest military funerals. And that's just because it is within the scope of the law. How far do you think this hate group would get if the government opened up to religion? These people claim to be of the same religion and faith many of us are. So you see, you can't be entirely certain that things like that wouldn't happen.

So great! We've succeeded in making our government a Christian government. But wait... we've been duped into electing someone of a different faith (or a fanatic of our own faith) that has the power to change the laws to favor their beliefs. Uh-oh. And the worst part of this scenario would be that we did it to ourselves by cheering on these notions that we need an openly Christian government.

If you're so boxed in that you think there would be no shift in population and belief systems as the future rolls on, then I have nothing for you. And if you think it's okay to persecute those who believe differently, I have nothing for you, either. This also goes for those who love to tell others they are going to go to hell or any variant on that. That is snobbery via religion and one of my pet peeves. Who knows what God really wants or what God has planned for others? Not I. And likely, not you, either.

And we don't just have to look at history. The terror our ancestors lived with is real in the current world, too. Two online acquaintances come to mind; one in the Middle East who fears for his and his family's lives everyday because of his Christian beliefs and another one who barely escaped the horrors of genocide when she was a child. It's horrible what other people have to go through every day and we want to sit here and squabble about words on a sign and how our "rights" are being stripped away.

I think Americans have lost a little of that rationalization that comes from fearing for your life daily like our ancestors once did. Like many in the world still do.

Seriously, it is a sign. It is a piece of wood with words on it and to consider that it holds any significance in reflecting the town's Christianity is ludicrous. In the meantime, the lawsuits that will crop up over this will likely bankrupt the town. I guess if that's what Sylvania residents want their tax dollars spent on, they can have at it. But what good is that going to do anyone?

Really, no one is being denounced or denied. You can still pray, you can still go to church, you can go sing Amazing Grace in the middle of Walmart, and you can even, as the Times Journal suggested, post your own signs.

Just as you may be baffled at how a Christian can think it is okay to take scripture off a town welcome sign, I'm baffled at how other Christians refuse to look at history and the bigger picture of what we'd really be giving up if we allowed religion in government. 

I always end my blog posts with "Peace, love, and..." whatever my overall thought for the post is. It is important because that is what my faith is to me. Believe, pray, share with others, be peaceful, be happy, and love one another.

The rest is up to Him.

Peace, love, and more,

Pamela

Don't pity me. I'm no weirder than you.

It's been an interesting couple of weeks since my book released digitally.  I'm learning some things.

First, there's been the pleasant exchange of words from people who have already downloaded my book.  It's quite a strange thing to get used to, being the introvert I am.  People address me as I walk into an establishment, "Hey, I've downloaded your book and can't wait to read it!"

"Great! Thanks!" I say as I try my best to be polite.  But I'm not the most socially adept person in the world, not by a long shot, and I feel quite awkward and self-conscious when responding to fans or would-be fans.  I am muddling through the best I can though, and hope beyond hope that I don't inadvertently give anyone the impression that I'm not grateful for their support.  I am very grateful and humbled, I just don't verbalize that very well so please excuse this.

Second, when people find out that I have written a book, the inevitable questions are, "What kind of book is it?" and "What is your book about?"

It's difficult to trim hundreds of pages down into a verbally satisfying synopsis.  I have yet to master this skill.  Most of the time, I simply say, "It's science fiction."  I can automatically tell who the fellow nerds and geeks are as their eyes will light up at the prospect.

But then by the same token, I can tell who the "normal" people are.  They either have an amused look on their face or a look of pity.  Surely, as a writer of science fiction, I can't possibly be grounded in reality.  My poor kids must be up to their ears in Star Wars toys.

Wait... um, so maybe that isn't the best point for me to make.  Eh, can't really think of another point right now.

But hey, I'm sure you normal people out there have your own weird quirks.  I have yet to meet anyone who wasn't, in one way or another, weird.  But I don't really think of it as weird.  I think of it as unique and unique is fantastic.  Without the uniqueness of people, I wouldn't have anything to write about.  Science fiction or not, a story has to have the elements of humanity embedded within.  Quirkiness is a huge element of humanity.

So you may laugh at my weirdness all you want.  As long as you don't mind me laughing at yours. :)

Peace, love, and uniqueness,

Pamela

I'm disappointed in Shadrack McGill

I wonder if anyone out there can relate to this theoretical scenario. Let's say you work at Company XYZ. You meet a guy at the store one day and the topic turns to your job. Come to find out, that person wants to work in the same field. You think that person would be perfect for the job and so you talk your way up the chain; you vouch for him, state your support for him and the guy is hired. You feel pretty good about it for awhile... until the guy says something that completely embarrasses the entire company. How do you feel after something like that? Embarrassed? Disappointed? Heart broken that the guy didn't live up to your expectations?

That's me. A couple of years ago, I publicly supported McGill on DeKalb Ramblings. I voted for him and urged hundreds of readers to vote for him, too. When I saw a story yesterday morning and realized the scope of how far the story stretched, I was shocked and embarrassed. Certainly he didn't mean what he said. But the audio was right there. There was no denying it and no recourse to say that it was out of context when it was right there in plain English.

If you haven't a clue what I'm talking about, click this, go read it, listen to the audio, and come back. Go on. I'll wait for ya.

I'm not gonna sit here and say that I got him elected. That's absurd. (And my ego isn't that big.) But I did put myself out on a limb by supporting him and now to have him insult an entire profession, a profession that I'm studying to get into, it's... well... embarrassing, disappointing, even a little heart breaking.

I've really tried to keep my opinion to a minimal. I had to do an objective run down of events for Examiner but I needed to do a commentary for Yahoo!News, too. Even still, I've been trying to keep my mind open. I still wanted to hear from him if only to gauge for myself what in the blue blazes he was thinking about when he said that.

But when I got home from classes last night, I read all the follow-ups and watched the interview on WAAY 31's website where he talked about balance and corruption and having quality teachers because of low pay but justifying a legislative raise he said he was going to do away with. I'm just kinda shaking my head about it all. Even if he responds to my messages, at this point, it's going to take a lot to convince me that he's working in the best interest of state education.

And you know what the kicker is? A lot of people are focusing on the separation of church and state issue he spoke of and ignoring his attitude about teachers and education. My head is freakin spinning.

You know, I think McGill is a fine person and I'm not going to fault him for his opinion. He has every right to it as much as you or I do. However, I don't think he represents my interests any longer. I feel that he is going to have to say or do something remarkable if he expects to get reelected. From all indications, and from every poll I've seen thus far, it just ain't gonna happen. (That's as southern as I'm going to get in my writing for today.)

Alabama is one of the poorest and least educated states in the U.S. Obviously, what Alabama has been doing with education hasn't been working. And here's my creative metaphor for the day:

When the side of a house cracks over and over, no matter how many times you patch it up, you know that something deeper is wrong. The foundation is off balance and needs repair. It takes a lot of effort and more work to repair a foundation than it does to patch up a crack. But in the long run, if you repair the foundation, you'll be saving lots of time and money that you would've spent continuing to patch the side of the house.

THAT's our education in this state. Our state leaders keep throwing money here and there to patch the cracks in the side of the state. They don't realize that in order to properly repair our state, we need to go in and repair the foundation of the state. That foundation is our public education. Those kids can grow up knowing how to live on their own, knowing how to hold a job, knowing how to start a business, knowing how to become responsible state (and national) leaders. Without education, we have no future for Alabama. People who want better for their children will leave. Businesses will leave or not even come here to start with. Teachers who want more out of life than continuing to struggle to pay student loans and other bills will go to states that pay competitively.

And you know what? It's already happened. I know a wonderful Christian teacher who decided to teach elsewhere because she couldn't get the pay here that she could out-of-state. That doesn't mean she's "low quality" or "not called" or just after a paycheck. It's highly insulting to suggest otherwise. She wanted a better life; one that she couldn't get here. There's nothing wrong with wanting or striving for a better life, and it's certainly not against any Biblical principle that I've ever heard.

It's not about religion or balance. It's about investing in Alabama's future. It's about our state leaders having the right attitude toward education.

I can write about it all I want and it's not going to make a difference, though. Voters are going to have to care and stand together. It sounds corny but look what protesting did to halt SOPA. Alabamians do have it within themselves to demand better. They just need to speak up.

Peace, love, and thinking before speaking,

Pamela

Sorry, Crazy, I'm all booked, thanks.

Something dramatic has happened in my life. For the first time in a long time, I'm fully booked.

I started classes (for the first time in ten years) a couple of weeks ago. And in addition to being a writer, I'm also a freelance editor. I can't recall a time when I have had book after book lined up from clients to edit. This is starting to happen now; as soon as I almost finish with one project, I have another lined up to go. There's a possibility I might also be doing some ghostwriting soon. I've had to take on more responsibility with Fiction Lake due to an illness the editor is dealing with in his family. And to top it all off, I am once again writing as the DeKalb County Examiner.

In any case, I'm feeling blessed as of late and I hope this is a trend that continues to follow me this year. I'm certainly up for some hard work. I don't even have time to open the door for craziness! So if I don't update this blog very often or poke my head into Twitter or Facebook, this is why.

And let's not forget that in addition to all this, the first Barrier story will be out very soon and later this year, my debut novel, The Influence, will be released.

Yes, very blessed.

So don't get worried if I don't check in as often as I once did. It only means I'm working hard.

Peace, love, and thanks to the Almighty,

Pamela

Rainsville Girl in Lauren Alaina Video

Okay, so second post in one day but I had to share this. I went to the gym this morning and you know how women love to talk! I overheard that a local gal was in a Lauren Alaina video. I love local stories and love when a local goes out and chases their dreams. So click this link to YouTube to see Rainsville gal, Courtney Willingham (playing the waitress) in the new Lauren Alaina video, "Georgia Peaches".

Congrats to Courtney for this recent bout of success!

Standing up - Part 2: Life isn't like the movies

Last night I overheard my husband remark to his daughter, "Zeke isn't free anymore." He was referring to the fact that my youngest boy just turned 4 and many of the restaurants in the area will now no longer let him eat free. "And we can't say he's still 3 because of Honest Abe over there," he remarked gesturing toward me. I'm sure he meant it as a joke because he knows how important it is to me to set a good example for the boys. What are they going to learn if I have them lie in a restaurant about how old they are? That lying is okay as long as you're getting something for free?

Even though I knew it was more than likely a joke, I admit (yeah, sometimes I'm a great big wuss) that it does hurt my feelings when completely innocent people poke fun at people who are good natured. I can't tell you how many times I've been called a "goody two-shoes" growing up. It was a contradiction for me to see movies where the good guy always won, for me to see the arrogant prick get the take down he deserved but then go back to reality and see the exact opposite. More often than not, the people with hidden agendas win and it is the good guy who has to suffer the humiliation of failing when he tries to stand up for himself.

And then we wonder why there ain't (yeah, I'm southern; sue me) more good-natured people out there. Who wouldn't feel incredibly withdrawn after a lifetime of "Honest Abe" stabs or being called self-righteous or self-important for only wanting to do what is right?

Twist of Fate

Then I opened up my Facebook this morning to discover that a man who grew up in my community, a man whose family I've known since I was little, is actually a fellow writer who has just released his debut novel, The Mason Jar (by James Russell Lingerfelt). I don't know Russell that well personally; I was more associated with his big brother, country singer/songwriter Dewey Wayne, who was a grade ahead of me in school. I met their father a few years ago and their mother a few months ago and I can easily say they are one of the nicest families you could ever hope to know.

But anywho, back to the point, I found out about the book through our local paper and in the interview, Russell is quoted, "As kids, we grow up, and we are taught by society that if we are the right kind of person, and do the right things that things will work out... Reality tells us that's not true." I thought it a strange coincidence that I read that interview this morning while contemplating the very same things last night.

The book looks very interesting and I can't wait to read it. It's now officially on my (very long) reading list. Congrats to Russell on his debut. I wish you great success!

Something positive for the holidays - Giving thanks!

I want to take a moment to tell you a nice little Christmas story. Just when I see, hear, and read things that are to the detriment of society, I then run across something that restores my faith in the general good.

My cousins and aunt from out of state have been through a very hard time recently. They came to my neck of the woods with little more than the clothes on their backs. They came here because of my sisters and I; with us nearby they would have the emotional support of family to help them tread through this rough patch and turn their lives around. My sisters and I are also struggling (all of us in college) so we haven't been able to do much for them financially.

One of my cousins, a wonderful young man who has recently been saved at one sister's church, has been taking GED classes. I'm not sure what his plans are but he is making great efforts to better his life and I'm so proud of him.

Recently, he thought he had hit it good; he found a way he could take the GED test for free. When you're relying on someone else to take you to classes, while also trying to figure out how you're going to pay for the basic necessities of life, the $50 to take the test was non-existent. But for some reason or another, he found out that the test wasn't free at all. He would still have to pay $50; money that he didn't have and probably wouldn't see for a long time.

Then along comes Santa, who had heard of my cousin's plight, and $50 was sealed and cleverly delivered. We know who this Santa really is but I'm not going to embarrass this person (or have people knocking on this person's door for more money). I just want to thank this Santa. I know $50 isn't a lot to some but in this little family circle, it is. This was probably the best gift my cousin could have gotten this year.

It means a lot to us that there are caring people like you out there who have faith in others. From my family to yours, Merry Christmas and thank you from the bottom of our hearts. :)